Ruth at the midpoint of her life in the 60s
Memorial Service in Glorietta Canyon
January 12, 2007, 4:30 p.m.

The Life and Times of Ruth Johnson
1928-2007

Master of Ceremonies: Jim Rickard
Photographer: Grace Rickard


51 of Ruth's closest friends attended, despite unusually cold weather, at one of Ruth's favorite spots - adjacent to where she had camped on a few occasions

SPEECH GIVEN BY Dr. James Rickard
Jim was a close friend and is a well known Borrego Resident.

Ruth always enjoyed sunsets, so the family arranged that the memorial was timed to start before and end after sunset 		Ruth Johnson died of a severe stroke on January 4, 2007 at Alvarado Hospital. Her three children were at her bedside when she died.

In her early and later years Ruth struggled with health problems. She was unable to find help from the medical establishment, so she often investigated and experimented with alternative medicine and therapies. She was able to get a handle on some of the problems in the last few years, but her age compounded the problems faster than she could fix them.

Some of the skills she mastered during her life include:

Seamstress:

She could do anything with fabric: mend, sew, crochet and knit. She was a seamstress. She made Afghans and quilts. She upholstered furniture. She made curtains. She got much more use out of everything, cheating the landfills.


The family arranged to have about half a dozen quilts and afghans to be given away. At this point in Jim's speech, he offered these to the gathering, so that they could better ward off the chill in the air. All were taken. As these were examples of some of Ruth's handiwork, and she would have gladly given them to her friends, Jim suggested that these be kept as a remembrance of Ruth.
Attendees Carmen Perez and Marilyn Bean comforted by one of Ruth's quilts

Carpenter/Builder:

She could skillfully and quickly do anything with any building material: make cabinets, furniture, erect buildings. She was familiar with all types of carpentry tools. She made her own designs and could look at someone else’s design and quickly improve on it.

She could do most handyman and builder jobs, including plumbing, flooring, roofing, paneling and painting.


A small bookcase (located behind Jim)
was brought as a sample of her work
Ruth is at right in this picture taken in 1985. Here she is installing roofing on daughter Elsa's house in Mansfield TX

Artist: She could draw and use calligraphy to create any type of document or artistic presentation. She had a wry sense of humor which showed itself in clever ways in her art.


1956 Christmas card
Ruth at work at her drafting bench

Driver:

She learned to drive and pilot many types of vehicles: bicycles, motorcycles, cars, trucks with or without trailers, tractor trailers, and even airplanes.


Ruth hauled this tractor trailer rig for 5 years from the late 70s
In the early 60s, Ruth drove these:
a 1964 Mustang convertible and Honda 50

Gardener:

She had a green thumb. She used power tillers to produce some large and productive organic vegetable gardens. She innovated by having grass clipping compost around the garden plants, creating some amazing produce. She could landscape, making gardens with decorative borders, trellises, and other features. She planted flowers, shrubs, and trees in dozens of places she lived and visited.


Ruth helped daughter Julie with this
vegetable garden in 1974 - 5 in New Mexico
Ruth tending "Victory" garden in 1944

Tennis Lover:

She loved to play tennis, and was an active member of the Borrego Springs Tennis Club. She regularly competed in doubles competitions, and was feared as a worthy opponent.


Ja Nell and Ruth won a
tournament in 1998
Ruth in 1985
Ruth last won a tennis tournament playing in the BSTC upper division, February 2003. Her partner was Vicki Anderson

Spiritual Seeker:

She was a member of an Astrology group. She read heavily about alternative lifestyles, psychics, the occult, eastern philosophies, and new age spiritualism.


Ruth by one of her creations 		Her children remember some of her Halloween and Christmas decorations. When Christmas trees were unavailable some years, she used whatever was available. Several years she fastened branches of various types of trees to plywood making a raised two-dimensional tree. For many years she erected three candles, varying up to 12 feet tall. She sewed fabric in the shape of flames and illuminated them with light bulbs.

She created a full sized Santa, placed him on the roof and moved him closer to the chimney each day. The year the song, “Purple People Eater” came out, she made a 8-foot tall smoking purple Halloween costume.


Santa sitting by creator Ruth
Giant Jack-O-Lantern - creator Ruth at left


Here is a rough timeline of her life:

She was born Ruth van Leersum in the Watts area of Los Angeles, California on January 16, 1928. Her father, Gerard, was an immigrant from Holland and worked as a carpenter. Her mother, Helene, descended from German immigrants who lived in England. Ruth was the youngest of 5 children. She was raised in a poor neighborhood in the midst of the great depression of the 1930’s.


Ruth at about 3, 1931
Ruth at about 10, 1938


Ruth at about 18 reading "About Things"

Teenage Years: 1938-1946:

During the war, being very bright, she graduated high school 2 years early at the age of 16. She then went on to Compton College and earned an Associate of Arts in 1946. At college, she could have been a champion in ping pong, badminton, and tennis, but, she did not have the money to travel to tournaments. In 1946, she fled her home and lived with a couple who taught at her college. It was in college that she met Robert Johnson, her future husband, in calculus class. According to Robert, she was the brains in the class and many sought her out for help.

Marriage and Children 1947-1960:

In 1947, she and Robert wed. They purchased a lot in the Silver Lake district of LA and lived with Robert’s family while they built their home. She was the expert in construction with what she had learned from her father. Robert says: “I was the elephant and she was the carpenter”. They built a small one bedroom house and moved in with a dirt floor. Ruth worked at Title Insurance and Trust Company as a trust deed typist. Late in 1951, she quit, after becoming pregnant. Ruth gave birth to Julie (1952) and Jef (1953). While at home raising her children, she terraced and landscaped the barren hillside behind their house to prevent erosion. In 1954, she took a job painting china, supporting the family so Robert could go to USC. In 1956 her daughter Elsa was born. In 1957, she leapt back into the work force as a dispatcher for the LA Police Department, and later designing storm drains for the city of LA. In the winter of 1958 she took a solo trip to Europe, visiting some relatives and sight-seeing in France, Holland, England, Italy and Switzerland. In 1959 she and Robert sponsored an adopted war orphan relative, her cousin Roy, from England, who is still living in California.


Robert and Ruth working on landscaping project
Original 1 bedroom house

Working Mother 1961-1964:

In 1961, she and Robert divorced and she purchased and fixed up a split-level house near a hilltop overlooking Chavez Ravine. The new Dodger Stadium was built in full view of the renovated back yard, which included the addition of a full-sized swimming pool.

She worked at the LA Stock Exchange for a time as a secretary to Don Lynch, with whom she would in later years work with as an equal. She took flying lessons and got her pilot’s license around 1963. Daughter Elsa recalls flying with her to an airport in the desert. She and the instructor waited on the ground watching Ruth perform her first solo flight. Elsa now feels she herself is flying solo, while here life-instructor mother watches. In 1963, she used her college technical training to get a job with the LA Board of Education, working in civil engineering. During this time she experienced gender harassment -- she was underpaid, told how to dress, what to drive, and not given proper respect by her co-workers.


Ruth's new pool, circa 1964
Ruth at work

Entrepreneur 1965-1976:

In 1965, she started working with Don Lynch, forming Bighorn, a holding company that developed various businesses. She moved to Austin, Texas and set out on her business career as vice-president of the Leersum Oil Company. Several oil wells were drilled and sold to a large oil company.


Ruth by one of her oil wells, 1965
Ruth with daughters Julie and Elsa in Austin

While in Austin, she purchased horses for her children and became the ultimate “rodeo mom” by hauling the horses to many horse shows where her daughters won many trophies and ribbons.

In 1967, she went to work for the Deductible Indemnity Insurance Co. in Little Rock, Arkansas, another offshoot of Bighorn. While living there, she bought 35 acres of land in the Ozarks with a real log cabin. Ruth loved fixer uppers and this was a dream job for her. Unfortunately, the fireplace was flawed and the cabin burned down while she was at work one day.


Ruth standing in front of her log cabin in Ozarks
Only foundation of log cabin remained after fire
Almost none of her belongings survived


Ruth had this water well drilled to supply water for the Borrego Racquet Club - son Jef remembers watering the first trees there before the project terminated 		In 1968, she moved to Borrego Springs, California where she worked on developing the Borrego Racquet Club. The residential development died after plans were near completion due to lack of funding beyond Ruth’s control.

In 1970, she moved to Mineral Wells, Texas to work as the General Manager of the Barrier Corporation, a manufacturer of artificial foliage. She ran the company successfully for a number of years, even designing some of the molds used to produce the foliage. She became part owner of a light plane. From 1970-74, she proudly witnessed Julie, Elsa, and Jef graduate from high school, all first or second in their class, and move on to college.


Article about Ruth in Mineral Wells (TX) Index
Ruth at left talking to employee at Barrier Corp.

Truck Driver 1977-1982:

In 1977, she took on a new course in life and learned how to drive the big semi-trucks. She had a good job hauling cement. She had a few hair-raising stories about working and driving in icy conditions with under-maintained trucks and trailers. Once, while loading cement, a hose explosively let loose and she experienced damage to her ears and eyes. After about 5 years of driving trucks, a job she loved, she had to quit due to other work-related health problems.


Daughter Elsa and Ruth in front of Ruth's TXI cement hauling rig
Close-up of daughter Elsa and Ruth

Exploratory Years 1983-91:

For the next 7 years, she worked on various temporary jobs. During this time, using her carpentry skills, she helped her daughter Elsa build a house in Mansfield, Texas, and son Jef build his home in Borrego Springs, California. She supported her daughter Julie during a period of turmoil associated with a divorce and the birth of her first grandson, Thorwald. In 1990, she went to school and learned CAD/CAM. Afterwards, she got a job as an electronic draftsman with Luminator.


Ruth with all her children, their father Robert and his wife, Helena, and grandson Thor -- Christmas 1991
Elsa's Mansfield house after completion


Ruth at the Kremlin, 1985

Retirement 1992 to 2007:

In retirement Ruth was free to live a more gypsy-like lifestyle. She traveled to Mexico, Iceland, Great Britain, NE Canada, NW Canada, Alaska, Russia, and India. In Borrego Springs She got back into tennis and continued playing to the end. She tried her hand at writing, taking a creative writing class. She showed Elsa some of her favorite wilderness haunts on camping trips. She discovered how much fun white water rafting is on the Kern River. She often made trips to the beach. One of her favorite places was Ocean Beach. She was a loving and protective Grandma.

Ruth is survived by her sister Susie Boyer of Coursegold, California, daughter Elsa Johnson of Lewisville, Texas, daughter Julie Johnson and son-in-law Doug Scott of Socorro, New Mexico, son Jef Johnson and daughter-in-law Kathy Johnson of Borrego Springs.

Ruth leaves grandchildren Logan Scott, Thorwald Johnson, Stacey and Holley Charron.

Ruth was a generous person and was always volunteering to help whenever she saw someone was in need. Ruth was a doer, someone who solved problems and worked solutions through to the end. Ruth experimented with life, not asking “why” but asking “why not?” The world needs more people like her.

Speech given by son Jef
Ruth was my mother. I could imagine none better. She was always there when any of us were in need. She looked beneath the surface when visiting friend or family, and always found a creative way to improve their environment, whether by saying a kind word, or by repairing or making something for them. I would estimate she made thousands of things for people throughout her life. Some were mundane, like blankets, shelves or tables. Some were huge, like designing and building entire houses. All showed her special form of artistic flourish. I see her work everywhere in my house, and regret not asking her advice on many projects I started on my own.

Now she is gone. She got her wish to not suffer long. She got her wish to be independent and to travel whenever she wanted up until her last hour. Her end was of the type she always desired. I am happy about that. I am proud of her life and accomplishments. She was a genuinely good soul, strong enough to do most of the things she set out to do, and I believe she made the most of her life. I am so happy and proud that so many people loved and admired her.

I remember the day mom took me to work with her driving a load of cement on her 18-wheeler. It was a 200-mile drive from Dallas to Austin. I was so proud and amazed at how mom could handle such a big rig.

But mostly I remember events since she turned 65. These were ever more precious since each adventure may have been the last, as her health was mostly failing at this time. I remember playing in the local mixed doubles tennis tournament with my mom as a partner and winning one year (March 1994)... Climbing Whale Peak with her, we witnessed some beautiful views, and finished up by bouldering down a steep slope in the quickly fading light and witnessing a great moonrise - it was a magical moment. Working together on some large projects, like completely renovating her favorite sister Virginia’s apartment, her cousin Patti’s townhouse, and re-roofing my sister Julie’s roof – yes! She was on the roof ripping out old roofing, measuring and laying out new tar paper and sheet metal, and hauling and nailing shingles at the age of 77.7 years! She loved to build things and I believe she was pleased that I was following in her footsteps. I’ll always treasure the many times we got to work together.

I miss you and love you mom!


Ruth near summit of Whale Peak, 1992
Ruth working on roof at nearly 78 years old

Speech given by daughter Elsa
Ruth Johnson was the best mother anyone could hope for. Many of my friends envied me because my mom could show me how to do so many things.

Mom was also very brave. She got us horses when we moved to Texas. Although she was afraid of horses, she helped us with them in many scary situations. We had a problem horse that got sick when we were out of town. She called the vet and held the horse while the vet worked. The horse reared up and put a hoof print on mom’s chest as he knocked her over. She continued helping us with the horses even after that harrowing experience.

I told her that the thing I always wanted from her was to show me how to build my own house. We picked out 7 acres outside of Mansfield. TX. We built a two story house together. I had an auto accident that kept me from being much help. She did most of the construction work herself.

Late in life Mom was something of a gypsy. She traveled around in her pickup trucks, touring the US and Canada. She backpacked in Europe, visiting the UK, Iceland, and the former Soviet Union. I wanted to share this experience with her, so she took me on several camping trips. We explored California together in her truck. She was in her 70’s at this time.

Mom was extremely proud of her children. She never threw away something we made for her. When it wore out she mended it.

She was extremely creative. She made these extraordinary greeting cards using a combination of a drawing, photographs, and a sense of humor. My own birth announcement showed me being flown in by the stork.

Christmas was always a very happy time in our family. Instead of a tradition, Mom always wanted to do something original. One year she hung up a Catalina Cherry tree from the ceiling. She designed ornaments made by wrapping yarn soaked in flour paste around balloons. We all made these for this tree.

Mom was a helping hand to many people, both friends and family. If she saw something that needed to be done she just did it. She sponsored several children in the poorer countries through World Vision. She wanted her life to have meant something. She succeeded beyond her wildest dreams.


Daughter Elsa competing in rodeo event
Ruth and daughter Elsa, circa 1984
Samut Sular,
World Vision Child

Julie’s Stories about Ruth Johnson (Read by Rosemary Fey)
My Mom is the first miracle I ever saw. We loved each other at first sight, much like all mothers and their children. Mom was a true individual; I liked to think of her as an alternative Mom. I have always been proud of her. She was creative, productive and original. She felt our mistakes were discipline enough, she expected us to figure out how to do the mundane aspect of our lives and apply ourselves in school so that we would go to college. She was no soccer mom -- that was not her thing. Here are just a few stories of my life with Mom.

Red Hair. In 1960, Mom was 30 and I was 8. My Mom dyed her hair red. I was listening to her talking to her friend. She laughed that her husband, Bob, had not noticed her hair. She was sure he would not like it, but he hadn’t noticed. A few nights later, at the dinner table, I’m looking at Mom and laughing. Finally, my Dad demanded I explain what I was snickering about. I just pointed at Mom’s hair. Goodness my Dad got angry. However, as an antidote, when my hair started graying, I dyed it red just because of how beautiful my mother’s hair looked at that moment.

Grandbo. My mother became a grandmother in 1989 when my son Thor was born. She did not like the title of grandmother. After my son’s birth, I was separated from my X-husband and he was issued a court order to stay away after he had beaten me. Outside of my house, my Mom had a run in with him and he punched her in the face. She was 61 years old, hurt and bruised, but she was so angry with him. She felt she had protected her grandson. And so, she told me that we could call her “gRambo”. We did too.

The Rabbit Palace. When my sons were young, they had pet rabbits. These rabbits were in a small cage and had started to fight. Mom came to the rescue. She designed a large walk in cage and drafted my husband to help. Together, they created a 5 x 8 x 6 foot Rabbit Palace. She even made them a chateaux to sleep in. She was 71 at the time.

My mother loved life as long as she was in control. Changing her hair color, protecting her family and helping out where ever she could are a few examples of Mom’s imprint on my life.


Daughter Julie with Ruth in Sandstone Canyon
The "Rabbit Palace"

Speech given by Kathy Johnson

This same poem was read at Kathy's mother's funeral in 2003 		I'm Free:

Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free.
I'm following the path God laid for me
I took his hand and heard him call
I turned my back and left it all

I could not stay another day
To laugh, to love, to work or play
Tasks left undone must stay that way
I found a place at the close of day

If my parting has left a void
Then fill it with remembered joy
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss
Ah, yes, these things I will miss

Be not burdened with times of sorrow
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow
My life's been full, I savored much
Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief
Don't lengthen it now with grief
Lift up your heart and share with me
God wanted me now, he set me free

= by Chris Wade, written in 1994 when he was a student at Orange Glen High School, and read to Laura Gipson the last night of her life

Speech given by Marge Shuessler for Melanie Dharmagunaratne

Ruth in Bangalore. Melanie is at right


Ruth and Melanie were both active in the Dallas Toastmasters
On a Toastmasters pamphlet of Ruth's:
CF Communications - Dist 25 - Club 6572
Sponser Melanie - 9-1-93


Melanie

I am sorry that I am unable to be with you, but I wanted to record, and retell, all my memories of Ruth. There are many times in my life, over the years of our friendship, that she has been just the only women that I would admire and respect, tremendously.

My meeting with Ruth was such an experience, and one that I would never forget. In 1983, when Elsa worked in the UTA library, one day, she told me that she wanted to remove some wood that my student workers had moved to the garbage dump, to utilize it. It was excellent lumber, and I was glad that somebody could make use of it.

On a previous occasion, Elsa had told me that she had to go home to her mother and the cats, and I had a mental picture of Ruth as an old wizened lady, sitting in a rocking chair, with her cat on her lap, unable to look after herself, and needing the assistance of Elsa.

On the day, that the lumber was being removed, Elsa asked me to come and meet her mother, and I followed her, to the back loading dock, and was shocked to see a feisty lady of undetermined years, loading lumber in to a large pick-up truck. Lord, was I amazed! I am an Asian woman, (from Sri Lanka) and women in our cultural setting do not haul lumber, nor do they do "men's work". I was absolutely tickled with delight to meet Ruth, and she likewise was enjoying the fact that I was dumbfounded at her strength and abilities. Ruth nonchalently told me, "Melanie, since you were so kind to give me all this lumber, I would be glad to build some shelves in your garage for you". Well, I expected her to bring her son, or a man, to build the shelves for me. Saturday rolled around, and Ruth appeared, alone, so I asked her, "Was your son unable to come"? She promptly cleared my apparent ignorance about what women can and ca nnot do, by hefting a big belt of tools around her waist, and within a couple of hours, she had built me some beautiful shelves, which still remain to date, in the old house. We formed a friendship that was to last 23 years. First impressions count. That was Ruth, down to earth, and capable.

When my daughter was getting married in India, we invited her to come over for the wedding. She did so, and was the only person, WHITE in skin, (standing out like a sore thumb), among all the brown people, five hundred guests in number, around her. She was treated as a royal guest, and everyone just loved her. She even dressed up in a sari which is the national dress of India. What a wonderful time we had together. I was so deeply touched that she could come over for my daughters wedding, and take the time and the effort to get there.

What a woman! What a marvelous person. It was the fact that she was the most wonderful friend that anybody could ever hope to have.

Ruth, wherever you are, my friend, my heart will always be with you. Thank you for your friendship and love.

Goodbye. (Melanie Dharma)

Speech given by Grace Rickard
Grace was also a longtime friend and hiking partner of Ruth's

Ruth walking with daughter Julie and grandson Thor
Glorietta Canyon, 1991 		GLORIETTA CANYON:

This location was selected for Ruth’s service today because it was special to her.. Glorietta Canyon has been considered a unique place of quiet, retreat, meditation and reflection by many of us for a long time. Ruth often camped here overnight. In 1988, the Brazilian author, Paulo Coelho, also found this site and placed a statue here after, according to him, seeing his guardian angel at this very spot. Ruth discovered the story of the statue when she read Paulo’s book, The Valkyries, and so we have brought a statue of the patron saint of Brazil, Our Lady of the Apparition for the service today.

We would like to end the service with a few lines from Paulo, describing his thoughts on death:

Speech given by Marge Schuessler

Altar contains things from Ruth's life. Sitting on top of a flower afghan she made, is a statue of the patron saint of Brazil, Our Lady of the Apparition (provided by Jim and Grace Rickard) 		I... saw death as my daily companion, who is always by my side, saying: ‘I will touch you, but you don’t know when. Therefore live life as intensely as you can.’ Because of this, I never leave until tomorrow what I can do or experience today - and that includes joys, work obligations, saying I’m sorry if I feel I’ve offended someone, and contemplation of the present moment as if it were my last.

.... since I’m going to be cremated, there won’t be a headstone on which to write an inscription, my ashes will have been carried away on the wind. But if I had to choose a phrase, I would choose this: ‘He died while he was still alive:’ This might seem a contradiction in terms; but I know a lot of people who have stopped living, even though they continue working and eating and carrying on with their usual social activities. They do everything on automatic pilot, unaware of the magic moment that each day brings with it, never stopping to think about the miracle of life, not understanding that the next minute could be their last on the face of this planet.

We are all walking toward death, but we never know when death will touch us and it is our duty, therefore, to look around us, to be grateful for each minute. But we should also be grateful TO death, because it makes us think about the importance of each decision we take, or fail to take; it ... urges us to risk everything, to bet everything on those things we always dreamed of doing, because, whether we like it or not, the angel of death is waiting for us.

Concluding Remarks

Jim asking for any more remarks.
The Quimbys told the last story. Dave did the talking for both he and Mary

A few days after Ruth's death, Mary was up late, when she heard a noise from what the Quimby's referred to as "Ruth's room". Ruth stayed there when she house-sat there. She had been taking care of the Quimby house the day she died.

Mary walked in the room, and found the XM radio was on. The Quimbys could not figure out how it was turned on. Perhaps, Ruth's ghost?

Attendees
1. Harriet Schultz (BSTC)
2. Ja Nell Acosta (BSTC)
3. Bonnie Wilson (BSTC)
4. Michael Shoemaker (BSTC)
5. Nancy Shoemaker (BSTC)
6. Jackie Shallahamer (BSTC)
7. Ken Shallahamer (BSTC)
8. Jack Minkel (BSTC)
9. Joanne Cohen (Tennis)
10. Hal Cohen (Tennis)
11. Jim Gilloon (BSTC)
12. Francis Gilloon (BSTC)
13. Rachel Edwards (BSTC)
14. Gary Edwards (BSTC)
15. Fred Dow (BSTC)
16. Susan Dow (BSTC)
17. Harriet Lisak (BSTC) 		18. Lee Lisak (BSTC)
19. Marilyn Bean (BSTC)
20. Denny Bean (BSTC)
21. Ron Romeo (BSTC)
22. Mary Kay Romeo (BSTC)
23. John Schultz (BSTC)
24. Jim Perez (BSTC)
25. Carmen Perez (BSTC)
26. Rosemary Fey (TP)
27. Susanne (Winteyer? (sp))
28. Borden Granger (BSTC)
29. Sandi Granger (BSTC)
30. Betty Minkel (BSTC)
31. Gil Herrlin (Tennis)
32. Monica Herrlin (Tennis)
33. Jaraslav Medek (Tennis)
34. Bill Holst (Tennis) 		35. Trish Azar (BSTC)
36. Brent L Lathrop (TP)
37. Dave Quimby (BSTC)
38. Mary Quimby (BSTC)
39. Pete Azar (BSTC)
40. Marjorie Schuessler (TP)
41. Jill Gage (house sitted for)
42. Sonja McGrath (BSTC)
43. Al Lieb (BSTC)
44. Peg Lieb (BSTC)
45. Jim Rickard (TP)
46. Grace Rickard (TP)
47. Elsa Johnson (daughter)
48. Kathy Johnson (daughter-in-law)
49. Robert Johnson (former husband)
50. Helena Johnson (Robert's wife)
51. Jef Johnson (son)

Other photographs taken at ceremony

Photo by Harriet Schultz (all others at ceremony by Grace Rickard)










Comments from friends who missed the services:
E-mail sent to Jef:
I know her physical difficulties were painful. You have my sympathy.

I met Ruth through a mutual friend, Ann Robinson. Ann has also passed on. After Ann's passing Ruth and I occasionally touched base but I haven't seen her in over two years just e-mailing once in a while.

Dolores Smith (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
I met her approx. 7-8 yrs ago at the home of Ann Robinson, a mutual friend in SD who passed away approx. 5 yrs ago. I liked your mother as I met her but, unfortunately, our paths didn't cross again. We kept in touch thru email, at which time she would speak of you in gentle, loving terms & she would tell me what was going on in her life.

I know that she liked to travel & I so admired her for her ability/willingness to travel alone to places like the wilds of Alaska. I remember how she expressed her love of tennis & how she enjoyed the river/raft trip that she took w/her children.

Margie Medrano (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Was so sorry to learn of your Mum's death; you will miss her, I know you were very close.

I knew Ruth through my mother Leila Vennewitz, who used to rent a cottage for the winter months in Borrego, and Ruth would drive her to and from Vancouver B.C. She often drove me to the Palm Springs airport, and one on occasion you did when she was busy. I have seen the web-site of your wedding and enjoyed it.

Ruth was a great person to me, such an independent spirit, and travelling here, there and everywhere on a shoe-string. I shall miss our e-mail correspondence.

You and I have some sad times ahead; strange that Ruth and my husband died five days apart.

Carla Reed, Maple Ridge B.C.

E-mail sent to Jef and later to Elsa:
Good Grief, Jef, I'm so sorry and so shocked to hear of Ruth's death. It was truly a shock. I got home a couple of day's ago and had amessage from Maggie, her English friend with whom I've spoken a couple of times. She was devastated at the news she's heard from somewhere.

I got a call from Elsa and so hoped she'd call back so I could talk with her. I'm so in the dark as to who took care of getting her to the hospital , and were'nt you in New York visiting your wife's family? How did everyone get to her bedside....and how good of you all to be there together at the end.

How are you all holding up with the suddenness of it all? I know she'd always said, "I don't want to linger in a hospital", and Someone heard her wish... it's just so hard when your mom goes so quickly, when those last words never come.

I would so like to be at the Borrego ceremony and need to know where and when they'll be held. Please phone, as I don't get on this computer every day.

...not received in time, so later, an E-mail sent to Elsa:

Hi Elsa,

Just a note to ask how the ceremony in Glorietta Canyon went on Friday. I've thought endlessly of your mother and the good times we shared and what a hard worker she was, and how talented she was and how bright. Endless thoughts, in a good way, of all I knew of her. Her passing will leave a great emptiness in my heart.

I do hope all of you are coping well. Remember, in a way her health difficulties these last many months were most grievous to her. She always put on a brave front so as not to worry friends and family. I know it was not easy for her....

I send you Great Courage for these days ahead.

Peace, Priscilla (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
dear jef and kathy:

Ruthie and i were great pals. we met several years ago in the astrology class at daisy's, so, we have many good friends and memories from those days. some of our pals have since passed over and i'm sure ruthie is with her good friend ann now.

we were on the same paths in our friendship. it was easy for us to talk about literally anything. we both love the beach and often went to O.B. for a lunch of gyro and salad and spent many hours sitting on the wall near the pier. we just talked and watched the surfers and birds. it was always peaceful and refreshing to go there. sometimes, when i was really tired, we would just sit in her truck(her "home") and talk for hours - about astrology, the universe, life, death, our friends, coast-to-coast. she knew my life and i knew her life. she liked my upbeat outlook and i absorbed her pain. she was a smart gal and i respected that. oh yes, and she was "handy" - always building me a shelf somewhere or hauling furniture from a thrift store for me. the furniture in my apartment reminds me of her all the time.

i miss her. a lot. but i am so happy that she passed peacefully and quickly. i feel certain she has more answers now that she is out of her body. she had a beautiful soul - very compassionate. i always hoped she would know what it was like to love herself, but i was a failure in teaching her that.

like all of us on this planet, there were people and things she loved and people and things she had difficulty accepting. i often said that you can either go thru life kicking and screaming or you can sit back and enjoy the ride. harmony was her goal, but she fought it with all her might. she deeply loved her children, but never expressed it to them, always saying she never enjoyed being a mother. but, wow, her children all turned out beautifully and showed much love by always being there for her.

guess that's it. think i could write for another hour, but will end here.

Jody Dulin (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
i have a cabin in mt. laguna. she would drive up from borrego and i across to julian to have a cup of coffee, maybe visit the bookstore and generally catch up. she worked so hard to help her daughters in whatever way she could. she would share stories about them as well as her latest knowledge of alternative medicine and ways of thinking. her mind was always going.

i never traveled with her but enjoyed hearing her tales of adventure - an independent lady.

Joan Holland (Mount Laguna)

E-mail sent to Jef:
I believe that I met your mom out when I started teaching in Borrego. Elsa was my student & your mom invited me home for dinner. I think that it was 1975 (actually 1969).

She also lived with me for a while as did Elsa (later on). During those times we all did some intriguing past life regressions. The guy I knew said business was slow so he made an exceptonal offer in price. Maybe Elsa has the audiotape with the exact dates. I believe that your mom tapped into a lifetime as a Viking. It always amazed me how she loved the colder climates of northern Canada. Plus she really didn't need many possessions . At one time, she asked me not to give her any more clothing as she had more than she would use.

I really liked how your mom was willing to take on so many non-traditional jobs: roofing, carpentry, truck driving . . . . Plus she embraced so many new age concepts. She was so ahead of the times we live in. In Europe they use oxygen to treat so many traumas but your mom already used it here! While she shunned traditional Western medicine, she did her homework & knew a lot so many doctors don't know. She knew how unsafe microwave ovens are even before the general American public.

Jeff, I realize that this is sounding more like a eulogy than your fact finding mission. So I will stop. But I wondered if you could send me Elsa's # phone number. I wrote it down on a paper that I can't find. I want to keep in contact with her since she doesn't have her own family like you or Julie.

Am so happy that your doing this for your mom. She must be so happy on the other side with your showing your love for her like this! She always said you were a real sweetheart!

Tanya (Medina) (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Jef

My memory is shot to heck and I could never remember the dates of anything... but you know she built most of that house on Landa street and there was a time when she was a civil engineer for the city of glendale that she was a part time bookie for co-workers. Fortunately that didn't last long.

She let me live with her 1961-62 while I was going to UCLA much to Julie and Elsa's dismay...apparently I snored like a buzz saw even then.

I wish I could contribute more... but I'm sure Debbie can fill in a lot of blanks

Patti (Brun) (Ruth's niece, San Francisco)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Hi Jeff,

I am sorry to hear of your Mother’s passing. I send my deepest condolences to you and your siblings.

I am saddened by the news but I have fond memories of Ruth and the remarkable challenges she set up for herself.

Jeff I have not been reading my email as I had cataract surgery 29th of Jan and am recuperating. When I feel better I will send you some data on Ruth.

Thank you for your email!
My best to you and family,
Ida (O'Neill)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Dear Jef:

I heard today from my mom that your mom Ruth passed away this last week. I was sad to hear that she left you so suddenly. I hope that she didn’t suffer too much. I was glad to hear that you, your wife Kathy and your sisters were able to be there together with her at the end and support each other.

I know I haven’t been in touch these past years, as my life has taken me in different directions, but I want you to know that I still have fond memories of the time that I shared some adventures with you. Part of getting to know you was getting to know your mom, Ruth. I really liked so many things about your mom!

I was impressed by how tough Ruth was, and how she didn’t let societal expectations get in her way of what she needed to do.

I appreciated that she was a seeker, and that she never stopped trying to find her way. It seemed like she had always just learned something new that she was experimenting with—whether it was a new diet, a new way to meditate, or a new place to visit. That is something that so many people give up, and just take on the role that other people expect of them. Not Ruth.

Ruth always made me feel very comfortable around her, very welcome. She went out of her way to do that, whether it was preparing my star chart on her computer program, involving me in re-upholstering a loveseat, or giving me a welcoming hug. She was supportive without being intrusive.

It is always inspiring to know a woman older than oneself who is willing to pick up a hammer and saw (not to mention a ‘dremel’!—your mom taught me what that is) and fix things without a second thought about it. I marveled at how she would take bits and pieces of discarded things and re-cycle them into usefulness in unexpected and wonderful ways.

Your mom was a special woman; she made her special mark on this world. In the time that I knew her, she inspired me with her strength, her inquisitiveness and her willingness to ‘take the path less traveled.’

I always admired you, Jef, for all the support you gave your mom over the years. You should feel really good about that. I am so glad that you found a wonderful partner—Kathy—to be with you, especially right now. It makes such a difference, doesn’t it, to know that you’re part of a team and don’t have to shoulder difficult tasks all by yourself.

I wish you well as you go through this difficult time.

(Karyn Schultz) (Northern California)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Thanks for the info Jef and I am terribly sorry for your loss. From the few times I saw her, I could tell she was a very special person and she will be missed by all of us. Best wishes to you and your family,

Fred (Warburton) (San Diego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Jeff,

Eileen and I were deeply saddened to hear of Ruth's passing. She was one of the first people we met in Borrego and we both enjoyed her very much. I know that this is a tough time but please know that others are thinking of you.Our prayers are with you and your family. We were lucky to have known her.

Barry (Frahm) and Eileen (Childress)

E-mail sent to Jef:
Dear Jef

7 years ago when I first started coming to Borrego, I found a wonderful friend in Ruth. We often partnered up in doubles to confound the other team. We enjoyed the fact that she being a badmitten player, and I a squash player could beat those who had grown up in tennis. Those deadly slices of mine and her deadly lobs to the baseline as well as her never quit attitude and tenacity did them in.

I had hoped that next season, following my hip replacement surgeries, she and I would once again be able to enjoy the court together. I shall miss her, but will remember the good times we enjoyed together.

Glorietta Canyon is a beautiful place to have a remembrance. I will be with you in spirit.

Sincerely,
Toni Alexander (Borrego)

E-mail sent to Jef:
I was so sorry to read of Ruth's passing. What a shock that must have been. The only consolation for something like that is that she didn't suffer, or linger with no hope as some do with cancer. Our sincer condolences go to you and your family.

I want to thank you for continuing to send me the newsletter. I enjoy keeping up with everyone.

Judy Parrack

E-mail sent to Jef:
Jeff

I'm sorry to hear about your mom. No matter what anyone says it is hard to suffer the loss of your parent. We almost lost dad last November. Be thankful it was quick. Get strength form Kathy.

Greatest sympathy
Mark (Scott) Oceanside

CARDS RECEIVED BY THE FAMILY
Cover:
(over watercolor sunset landscape)

Love lives on forever in the memories, in the stories, in the hearts of all whose lives have been touched by avery special person.

inside:
May it comfort you to know that while the one you love is no longer with you, precious memories will live in your heart forever.

With deepest sympathy
George & Nola Kloeckner

She was a very special person, & friend (Borrego)

Cover:
(attached bouquet) with sympathy
inside:
Dear Jef & Kathy

Thinking of you at this time of sorrow

We were so very sorry to hear of Ruth's passing. She was a very special person and we will miss her so much. Please let us know if there is anything Craig or I can do. You are in our hearts and prayers
Nancy & Craig (San Diego)

Cover:
(Nice drawing of bird in bush) Though you cannot always see the bird singing, If you listen with your heart, you can always hear his song
inside:
Though the ones we love may leave life as we know it, in our memory, the love we knew will always carry on.

We are sorry about the sudden passing of your mom. May your fond memories help you through these difficult times.
your friends, The McClures

Cover:
(over drawing of lilly pond)

With Sympathy / May precious / memories help you / through this / difficult time ...

inside:
...and bring comfort / in these days of sorrow.

With Sympathy
Fondly Barb (Kirsch) - (Yucaipa)

Jef,

I was so sorry to hear of your mom's passing.

She was a special lady!

I had planned on asking her to be my partner next month

Cover:
With our sympathy (watercolor of river landscape with rainbow)

In the sad times of life,
it's part of God's plan
for friends to help friends
any way that they can.

inside:
Dear Jef & Kathy,
We thank you for introducing Ruth to us through tennis & hiking, and giving us an opportunity of knowing her love and humor.

May it help to comfort you
to know that someone cares,
Someone keeps you
close in thought
with very special prayers.

Your friends,
Fred & Susan Dow

Cover:
A mother's love is forever (embossed picture of a rose)
inside:
May your memories of your mother's love bring you comfort and peace of heart, now and through the days ahead.

In Deepest Sympathy
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Frank & Joanna Guthrey (San Diego)

Nice poem follows on next page

Cover:
(embossed flowers and butterfly)
inside:
Jef, Kathy & family,
Sending a gentle hug your way, to comfort you.
With much love,
Hank & Linda (Wennik -- San Diego)
Cover:
(watercolor of some flowers)

At this time of deep and very personal sadness

inside:
Jef & Kathy,
Please know that caring, thoughts and heartfelt sympathy are with you.
We were so sorry to hear about Ruth. I had so enjoyed talking to her last month about favorite places to travel to. She really peaked my interest in visting Newfoundland and Iceland. Borden said you had a nice memorial for her. We are sorry to have missed it, but I didn't want to bring my cold to the Borrego folks.

She will be missed
love,
Kersti & Fred (Wantland)

Cover:
(painting of vase with zinnias)

Wishing you peaceful moments, renewed strength and hope for Tomorrow...

inside:
Dear Jef & Kathy,

Loving memories, family and friends will stay in your hearts

...with each passing Day

We are so sorry. Ruth was a unique & special person.

Norman & Sandy (Roberts) - (La Jolla and Borrego)

Cover:
Artistic multi-layered picture of an iguana
inside:
Do not stand by my grave and weep
I am not there... I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am a diamond glint on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awake in the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight
I am the soft startshine at night.
Do not stand by my grave and cry
I am not there... I did not die

(separate note with kind words from Kathy's cousin, John Spillane)

Cover:
(Picture of dandelion seed pods in the mist) In the loss of your mother
inside:
...may you find comfort through the memory of her love

Gil & Monica Herrlin

We will see you Friday at the memorial service.

Cover:
Thinking of you

In the loss of your mother

(picture of mountain meadow with flowers and a rainbow)

There is love that will live forever, and there are memories that will shine through the sorrow.

inside:
May the wonderful memories of your mother's love be with you and comfort you at this time.

With deepest sympathy

Bryan & Vicki Kiehl (Escondido)

Cover:
(Picture of heavens)

Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones shines down to let us know they are with us.

inside:
With Sympathy

Jef,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I almost loved your mom almost as much as my own. At least she saw you happily settled with Kathy.

Your mom was original and unique, and I will really miss her.

If I can do anything please let me know.

With love,
Patti (Ruth's niece)

PS If you and Kathy make the Napa trip - I would love to see you!

Cover:
(picture of sunset behind mountains, meadow)

Beyond all suffering

inside:

No eye has seen...
what God has prepared for those who love Him.

Even now God's love embraces you

Dear Jef and Kathy,
We've thought fondly of you so often, and realize what a shock it has been for you to lose your mother so suddenly, Jef. May time bring back all the good memories so you can feast on them all your life!

Love, Bert & Mary Hutchinson

Cover:
(stylistic picture of a flower)

with deepest sympathy

(Group card from the BS Tennis Club)

inside:
thinking of you

Jeff, Nancy and I enjoyed the time with Ruth, both on & off the courts. She was a sweetheart! Our condolences to you and your family. Warm Regards, Michael & Nancy (Shoemaker)

Dear Jeff & Kathy, Your mom had such a beautiful smile - and it is my last memory of her at Borrego (last time...) She seemed very happy! She spread sunshine wherever she went, and she will be so missed. Sincere sympathy, Bonnie & Don (Wilson)

Jef and Kathy - We enjoyed your mother so much. We didn't know her long but really enjoyed her so much. She was very special and will be missed. Judy & Bill Linder

Dear Jeff, Ken & I are thinking of your & your family at this time. We always admired your mother & enjoyed her on the courts & off. She was a special lady & will be missed. She was also an inspiration to us all. Please accept our heartfelt condolences. Jackie & Ken Shallahamer

To Jeff & family / Deepest Condolences / Mary M(archese)

Jef, Remember all the good things - the thoughts may ease your pain. Our sympathies. Al & Peg (Lieb)

Jeff, We've lost a wonderful gal but we have such great memories of this very special lady, Marilyn & Denny (Bean)

Jeff, Lee and I are thinking of you during these hard times. We wish that you remember all the wonderful times you had with your mom. Harriet & Lee (Lisak)

Jeff, So sorry to hear about your mother. Please know we are thinking of you and your family in this time of sorrow, with sympathy, Jan & Gary McNamara

Jeff and family, Ruth, your mother, was such a sweet, bubbly person; and encouraging; - an interesting and very enjoyable person to talk to. She was a real prize. I was looking forward to renewing our friendship, and, needless to say, was shocked and saddened. Tom & Sara Haskins

Jeff. We really really enjoyed having to know your mom. She was a very wonderful person. We're really gonna miss her. Froom Nancy & Mike Shoemaker

Jeff, We'll miss Ruth - she was such a good friend to all of us. Our thoughts & prayers are with you & your family, Jim & Carmen Perez

Jeff: I truly enjoyed playing tennis with your mom & we had many good conversations I'll miss her! Sonja (McGrath)

Jeff - your mom was a "special person" - I treasure my friendship with her - Harriet (Schultz)

Cover:
(photo of a bouquet of white roses and tulips)

In Sympathy and Friendship

No one can experience this sadness as you do. For your feelings are unique and very personal to you...

inside:
No one can begin to know exactly how you feel, Except to know that sorrow such as yours is deep and real -- But if you need some comfort and some help to see you through, Just know how much you're cared for by all those who think of you. Keeping you Close in Thought

Jeff & Kathy, "Oh, what a shock" We are so deeply sorry - Ruthie was a great lady to know. And we will miss her. "Our sympathy is with you"

We were ill for a month or more. Feeling better every day (Ken & Bonnie Schauer, Lakeside CA -- formerly neighbors in Borrego)

Cover:
(painting of a water lilly)

A Notecard, sent by a friend after Ruth's death, but before finding out about it.

inside:
Sunday, Jan 21 2007

Dear Ruth,

I hardly dare count the unanswered letters from you over the winter. The fact is many problems of a health and other nature have piled themselves upon me.... details of ailments, then mentioned family troubles: Len, her son-in-law, died Jan. 9, just before her daughter's 70th birthday.... I miss Borrego more than I can say. Our winter this year is wet, windy, snowy, foggy, & Pauley Park has lost at least 3000 trees due to fierce gales. I enjoyed your description of "the wedding" & hope your life is running smoothly. Do phone me & forgive. Although I don't deserve it.

My love & may blessings help you through the year. Ever yours, Leila (Vennowitz - Vancouver CANADA)

Cover:
(Winter scene of Yosemite Valley)

mist below El Capitan -- Halfdome in distance, snow covered pines under full sun in foreground, blue sky above

inside:
3-11-07

Dear Jef

Thank you for the folder from your mom's cermony. I shared it with my mom and sent the web site to my brothers. I really appreciate the correspondence with your mom... she was a remarkable person. You did a good job with the web site. God bless you --

Willa (Bass) - Ruth's niece (from sister Sue)

Cover:
(painting of apple blossoms)

We're keeping you Close at Heart... During This TIme of Loss and Sadness

inside:
Dear Jef & Kathy,

Like every life, each sorrow is unique, and no one knows just what you're going through.

What we do know is that our hearts are holding you close and wishing you comfort, strength, and peace.

With Sympathy & Love, John & Susan (Chidester) Borrego Springs -- PS will call you when we get home.

Cover:
(picture of sunset over hills, lake in foreground)

Though there is great sadness in parting with someone so dear to your heart...

inside:
Jef

...may you find comfort in the thought that your loved one is now in a place of peace.

With Thoughts of Deepest Sympathy

Sorry to hear about your mom. Take care,
Joe & Barb Maffia

Cover:
(photo of a yellow chrysanthemum with pinkish background)

For every joy that passes, something beautiful remains.

inside:
With love and sympathy

Jef, we were very sorry to hear about your moms passing. Our thoughts & proayers are with you -- Sincerely, Jlue(sp?) & Bill (perhaps Judy and Bill Linder?)

LETTERS RECEIVED BY THE FAMILY
March 1, 2007

Dear Jef,

I was so sorry to hear about Ruth's passing. Thank you for sending me the card. It looks like you and your family gave her just the type of farewell that she would have wanted, to be remembered by family and friends in a place of pristine natural beauty.

Your mother was a good friend and good neighbor. She was extremely proud of you and talked of you often. I know it meant the world to her to be able to live near you and that she could depend on you.

I found Ruth to be inspriational. She and I had many enjoyable conversations over coffee. It was during the time that my children were small and I wasn't able to get out much. I was so impressed with the way Ruth lived her life and with her many accomplishments. It should be a lesson to us all.

I have lost Elsa's number and address in Lewsisville. If you talk to your sisten and think about it, please tell her that I lost her number.

I will remember Ruth Johnson with fondness.

Sincerely, Rosemary White (Mansfield TX)

Jef, a donation of $100 was made to the Anza Borrorego Foundation in memory of Ruth.

Norman & Sandy (Roberts)

March 4, 2007

Dear Jef,

Thank you very much for your letter about your mother, Ruth.

We had the good fortune to meet her at Dr. Halda Clark's store in Chula Vista many years ago. She recommended we look into Optimum Health which is a health retreat near Lemon Grove. We did that and attended their weekly program for 3 or 4 years. We kept in touch and she contacted us when driving through Seattle to pick a lady up in Alaska. We also coresponded and recieved the write up about her trip to India.

It was very interesting to read your tribute to her many accomplishments but were saddened to hear she had passed on.

Thanks again for your kindness. One often wonders what happened when we cease to hear from people.

God bless you, Sylvia Sutton Seattle WA

22nd February 2007

Dear Jef

Thank you for sending me the Memorial for your mum - Ruth. I was so saddened to hear that Ruth had passed away and so pleased to hear that she didn't suffer. It was good, too, that she was with friends and not alone.

Dana and I send you our sympathy at this time for the loss of your mum and our cousin. We will always remember Ruth with her love of life. We will never forget the 3 weeks we spent with her a few years ago as we travelled over 4500 miles from LA to Oregon - Charles & Betty Wagner live up there in Milwaukee - round to the Mt Hood, Grand Canyon, Las Vegas & down to Borrego Springs & back to LA where Roy, my brother, lives. I have phoned Roy to let him know. He was sad and asked that I convey his sympathy to you too. We were recalling together the time Ruth was in our home in Alexandria Park, London (Visiting Aunt Phyllis) and us playing Cricket in the local park when she stayed with us in Salisbury Avenue, here in St. ALbans. She was always "on the move" wasn't she? You must have some happy memories of RUth - hold on to them & from time to time, recall them to mind.

Ruth was a wonderful woman - full of life - always keen to help anyone in need even to the detriment of her well-being.

Thanyou Jef for the Memorial leaflet - I will treasure it always.

Our love and Best Wishes to you & your new wife, Kathy, to Elsa, and Juli(e).

Barbara (Baker) St. Albans, ENGLAND


Ruth, 12-3-06, at the tennis club, 1 month before passing away 		Included note:
Jef, This isn't a very good audience pic (picture of audience in final match of Dec 2006 BSTC tournament), but it's nice to see your mom in it! I miss her!!

Barb (Kirsch)

PS So sorry I couldn't get to the memorial, but I didn't get down until Saturday

Ruth's children and their family are very grateful to the tremendous support they received from all their and Ruth's friends. It has greatly eased their loss to know Ruth was such a positive influence in this world.

Some other aspects of Ruth's life:

circa 1960: Ruth made friends with Nora Pyle. They covered for each other when either of their children needed a ride and the corresponding mother was unavailable. They remained friends until Nora passed away in the late 90s.

Debbie is young lady to right of Ruth in this picture in Japan		1960s: Ruth made friends with Deb Lynch while travelling with her and her father, Don Lynch, on a trip to Japan. Deb remained good friends until Ruth passed away.

Andrea Arlotta 		1970s: Ruth made friends with neighbor Andrea Arlotta while living in trailer near Mineral Wells TX. They remained friends until Ruth passed away. The 2 of them went on a few trips together, including one to NW U.S. in 1999 just before Ruth continued on to Alaska.

Ruth took this picture of Maggie in England		1980s: Ruth met another lifelong friend, Maggie Granger from England, at the Optimum Health Institute in San Diego. They corresponded until Ruth passed away.

Leila Venowitz		1990s: Ruth met another lifelong friend, Leila Venowitz, whom she drove from Borrego to her home in Vancouver on a couple occasions. They corresponded until Ruth passed away.

Jody Dulin by O.B. Xmas tree		1990s: Ruth met some good friends in her Astrology group, including Daisy, Ann Robinson,Jody Dulin, and others.
Ruth made many friends in the Borrego Springs Tennis Club, and other members of the local tennis culture.
1994: obtained certification to perform massages, after attending California College of Holistic Health, but was never healthy enough to follow this career.

Ruth in Bow Willow Canyon 		1995: Ruth had always wanted to go on a backpacking adventure. When she bought herself a backpack for Christmas 1994, Jef promised to take her, but he Dilly-dallyed around until the end of spring, when Ruth reminded Jef of his promise. So he immediately suggested a hike neither had done. The 2 of them went on an overnight 10 mile backpack adventure in Bow Willow Canyon. Ruth was 67, but she completed the hike at a fast pace, despite severe pain in her feet. Both had a great time, and they even went exploring the Arroyo Tapiado mud caves on the way home.

2005: After attending the funeral of her brother, Van (Gerard), Jef and Ruth went out and got a bottle of wine to drink at the hotel. Ruth had a taste for wine, when her mother gave it to her as a child. A doctor had told her mother that her father would benefit from drinking wine to recover from a health malady. Her mother figured what was good for her father could be good for her only child still living at home, so she gave Ruth a glass of wine each night. Ruth had a taste for vino until she died. Jef found a case of "2-buck Chuck" Cabernet in her truck that she had bought just before her death.

That night, April 1st, 2005, after Van's funeral, after Jef and Ruth returned from the liquor store and met Elsa back at the motel, there was no corkscrew. Jef rummaged thru his car and found a screw, a drill-driver, and a pair of pliers. When going thru his mom's belongings, this is one of the things he found.

Jef found this unfinished poem in her notes:
Feathered friends chirp messages of love
I breathe deeply of Gods goodness
The warmth of the Sun comforts me.

Ruth by her Airstream, Dec 17 2006 		Ruth's last residence: Ruth moved the trailer she bought earlier in the year to Holiday Trailer Park a few hundred yards from the tennis club. The Grangers say she was in good spirits again having a place to call her own. She lived there about 2 months before passing away. In the photo at left, she is standing by her outside Christmas tree. Jef and Kathy are glad to have brought over a Christmas basket and enjoying a final glass of wine at Ruth's last domicile on the night of Dec 23 2006.

Early in 2006, Ruth made these letters for the next Christmas display. Jef regrets that he didn't bother putting this up in 2006. 		Final projects: When she died, the following building materials were recently purchased, and she meant to bring them back to Borrego the next day:
  • special material to make drapes for her Airstream
  • treated 2"x6" lumber for the base of a deck in front of her Airstream
  • 1 box of 3" deck screws for that deck

Jef asked wife Kathy to take one last picture 		The end:Just before 9 in the morning of January 3, 2007, Ruth called her friend Joy Seabright to ask if she could drop by for a visit. Joy said "how about 10:30?". Ruth said somberly "couldn't it be earlier?". Joy said, "okay, how about now?". Ruth brightened up and said she'd be right there. Ruth was always a "morning person". That was when she had the most energy.

Ruth had just finished having tea with Joy and her sister in del Cerro. She was in good spirits after regaling the 2 of her big plans for the coming year.

She got up to leave when the stroke occurred. Paramedics arrived within half an hour, and she was in the intensive care section of Alvarado Hospital within an hour. Everything that could be done was done, but Ruth was pretty much gone by the time she arrived at the hospital. By the time Jef and Kathy found out, it was late afternoon, and they were on the tarmac at JFK, helplessly waiting for the plane to be fixed. They arrived back in San Diego at about 10, and were at Ruth's side by 11. Ruth looked better than normal and at peace. She, however, had no life in her eyes, and after kathy read her chart, she determined Ruth would never be okay. The next day, with all children present, and all the tests in, it was determined that she was gone. The family decided to remove her breathing tube almost immediately (as Ruth had often said she didn't want to linger in a hospital).

Ruth told her kids that when she talked of a death in the family with her father, he replied "he died from lack of breath". The young Ruth assumed "lack of breath" was a disease. She, too, passed away from "lack of breath" 20 minutes after the oxygen tube was removed.

We'll all miss her!


Jef and mother Ruth, April 1998
photo by Karyn

DETAILED TIMELINE OF RUTH'S LIFE